28.6.18

22 Things I've Learned In 22 Years

22 things i learned at 22, 22 things I've leaned in 22 years

Turning 22 this year has made me realise that I have a whole lot of learning to do but also that I've learnt so many lessons in my life so far. I've made plenty of mistakes and I've learnt from them. I've trusted the wrong people and gotten hurt because of it. I've started making the right decisions for myself and putting myself first. I definitely don't have it all figured out yet but I've learned some valuable life lessons in my 22 years.

1. Its' 100% ok to not have your life figured out in your early 20s

Your 20s are for discovering who you are and the things that make you happiest. Don't get stressed about not having a perfect relationship, perfect job and life in your 20s. You'll figure it out someday, but this is your time for learning.

2. You're definitely not going to be married with kids by the time you're 24

You have to laugh at all those times in primary school when you're teacher would ask you what age you wanted to get married at and the majority of your class said 24 or 25. Yep, that's not going to happen. Maybe for some people it does but 24 comes around a lot quicker than you'd expect! 34 is probably a much more accurate estimate for it.

3. You're going to let the wrong people into your life

This is a given. The important thing is to learn not to let those types of people into your life again. These people will hurt you, take advantage of you and not value the amazing things about you. The wrong people will lead you to the right people.

4. Never feel guilty for putting yourself first

If you're a people pleaser like me, you'll know that it's hard to put yourself first instead of doing everything for others. Never feel guilty for not wanting to do something or deciding that something isn't right for you. You don't always have to make decisions based on how it will effect others. It's so important to put your own happiness first at times.

5. You'll learn how to say no

If you're someone who finds it hard to say no to things incase you complicate plans for someone else or don't want to put someone else out of their way, you'll learn that it's so necessary sometimes to say no to things that you don't want to do and not feel guilty about it. It's great to say yes to opportunities but it's also completely ok to say no to things you really don't want to do.

6. You'll fall in love with the wrong people and have your heart badly broken

You're going to fall for some jerks, no questions asked. You're going to fall for a guy who tells you he loves you but really couldn't give a crap about you. You're going to get badly hurt but you're also going to get through it and learn to never let the same horrible people hurt you again like that.

7. You'll learn to stay away from those types of people

You learn from your mistakes, simple as that. You learn to stay away from shitty people and you'll not let anyone hurt you like that again. You'll rise above it and be stronger than before.

8. You'll lose friends who don't agree with your choices, and that's ok

You don't exist to please other people. You're not here to make other people happy and conform to what others think you should be. Don't change yourself because someone doesn't agree with your decisions. Be you and if a friend is unable to accept that you're different to them then maybe they're not a friend after all. Your real friends will stick by you no matter what so only focus your time and energy on them.

9. A lot of people are out for themselves

Trust is something you'll learn to give sparingly and cautiously to people. A lot of people don't care about others wellbeing and will do what it takes to succeed. Be wary of people that you think aren't 100% genuine because in most cases, they're not.

10. It's so so so important to do the things you love on a daily basis

Your happiness and mental health comes from the things you love. If you do the things you love daily, your happiness will improve so much. Make time everyday to work on that thing that gives you happiness. It's very important to look after your mental health in your 20s.

11. Don't stress about things that are out of your control

If you can't change it or control it, let it go. If it's out of control, release it from your life and forget all about it. Don't dwell on it and erase it from you mind.

12. Don't try and make peace with a guy who screwed you over

Forgive if you can and forget that a**hole immediately. Don't stay friends with someone who didn't respect you or treat you like the amazing person you are. Let them get on with their life and be glad that you escaped that mess.

13. Casual dating is good to discover what type of person you want to be with

The more you date people, the more you'll find out what you're attracted to and what type of person you get on best with. Go on dates for fun and enjoy every experience you have with people. Don't be afraid to go on a few dates with different people to find out what your 'type' is.

14. One of the worst things you can do is compare yourself and your journey to others

Social media is fake. People post highlight reels of their lives and we can't help but compare how crap our lives seem to theirs. It's great for people to be proud of their accomplishments but not when it seems all too good to be true. Unfollow that person who constantly posts about how amazing their life is. It's having a negative effect on your mind and putting you in reverse rather than making you motivated. I advise to not follow anyone, but instead walk alongside the real ones.

15. Travel while you have the money and time to do so

Don't be scared to invest money in yourself by travelling and seeing the world and gaining amazing life experiences. There's no rush to have a house, mortgage, car etc. in your early twenties so make the most of this valuable time and see as much of the world as possible.

16. It's OK to try things and quit them if you realise they're not for you

If you got a new job and realised that it was the complete wrong thing for you, don't feel guilty about quitting to find the job that is right for you. If you take up a new hobby that you're not actually keen on, don't feel like failure for not continuing with it. Try as many things as possible until you find the things that make you happy.

17. Put yourself in new situations and try as many new things as possible, even if it's nerve wrecking

You'll grow so much as a person by putting yourself in uncomfortable situations. Do the things that scare you the most. Take risks. Tick off all of the things on your list of things you've wanted to try. You'll thank yourself for pushing yourself to do new things.

18. Remind yourself that things will get better

Even if it seems like they won't, things will get better. In the darkest of days when you're finding it a struggle to keep going, just remember that this is temporary and amazing things are coming when you make the choices to do so. The pain and suffering is tough but you will get through this and you'll be so much stronger for it.

19. Don't apologise for being you

Don't change for someone else just because they don't like something about you or don't agree with your choices. As long as you're not hurting anyone and are happy then don't apologise for doing things that you want to do. 

20. Don't rush into relationships and enjoy being single

People who constantly need to be in relationships are usually lacking in something big in their own lives. If you can't go six months being single then you need to seriously look at what your missing in your own life and why you can't cope on your own. Never rely on someone else for happiness and you should be able to be 100% as a single person on your own without needing anyone else. You need to be able to love yourself before you can love someone else.

21. If you have a gut feeling that something isn't right, then don't do it

Always follow your gut. If you have a bad feeling about something, then  you shouldn't go for it. Don't hope for the best if you know somethings not right. Assess every situation and make sure that it won't negatively effect your life.

22. Never ever give up on the things that make you the most happy

The one strength you have that will get you through the toughest of times are the things that make you genuinely happy. Whether it's playing an instrument, sport, cooking, dancing, writing, or anything that takes away your stress and pain, never give that thing up because it's what will get you through the toughest situations in life.

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22 things i learned at 22, 22 things I've leaned in 22 years

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